The Book of Love?

It's a new year! So of course it's a new chance for all us single ladies to FINALLY get a ring on it! But of
course, it's not something we can do alone, if it was we would have already done it. We need HELP and help is out there in the form of tips, blogs, articles and books.

A poor victim of Havishamnia

I'm touched that there are so many people out there who want to save me from Havishamnia (that's the state of perpetual spinsterhood that leads to bitter dementia and the inability to wear anything but a musty old wedding dress) really, I am. FindCyberLove.com is being particularly helpful in this endeavor, letting me know in sweet, helpful Emails that 1 and 5 marriages were made in Online heaven and that they have cracked the THREE, count em THREE, levels of love. Reading it got me thinking, is there really a blue print for romance, I mean is there a book of love that I some how have just manage not to find?

I think when it comes to finding love there is no magic formula. But I'm a spinster, so what do I know. So let's take a good look at Love --- Matrix Style.

Level One --- The Begging Method
Love is a battlefield and if you're going to win at it, you have to have a plan of action. FindCyberLove.com suggests that identify twelve people and ask them for one love referral. I must make lists, create a compatibility chart that will allow me  to tap into friends whose SINGLE man buds might be my type. When I've exhausted my friends circle of men, they suggest I quietly, carefully, and infrequently ask my co-workers to find me a man cause, you know why not bring the desperation to the office! This is going to take a lot of skulduggery because the chances of me finding twelve people who actually know a single man that they can throw my way  is sort of like the chances of Neo defeating The Matrix. But I can keep hope alive, but the odds are against me, still stranger things have happened right? If you are a friend of mine and you are reading this, you know what to do.

Level Two ---Love is Better in Your Head
You know that Lifetime movie in which a beautiful, successful woman "marries herself" because she is tired of everyone commenting on her single status, where the "as if" method is similar to that. FindCyberLove.com recommends that you live your life as if you are already in a commented relationship. Go out on the weekends and do fun stuff, I'm guessing fun stuff that your future mate is going to love so that you'll already be comfortable when you start going out; clean your closets so that when he moves in, he'll have space for his things; lean to cook, the aroma of your food will surely draw a man to you, he'll see your "cozy" life and long to be a part of it! OK! OR he might see you talking to, cooking for, and living with your imaginary lover and might just run for the hills! But be careful ladies don;t make your imaginary mate too HOT or too PERFECT cause you know, REAL LIFE GUY won't measure up, that's a free tip from me.

Level Three --The Magical Book of Love
Finally, the code to happily ever after is cracked here we go ladies in 5, 4,3,2,1.....
When all else fails the time honored tradition of the Love Chant from the Magical Book of Love works every time. And this is not just me saying it. FindCyberLove.com wants us to know that thousands of women can attest that this works! This process must be done after sunset and is best done between now and January 13th:

1. Light a candle (be sure to pick one with a scent that you like because a smelly candle might take you out of your zone).

2. Make of list of the qualities in a relationship you desire. (Use the present tense and be specific  after all you'd hate to get a Motel 6 guy if you only stay at The Ritz)

3. Read your list out loud. (And no, it will not work if you just read it silently. Your must tap into the power of  your voice, it is what pulls your wishes into the realm of reality, who needs a magic genie)

4. When you’re done reading your lists, release this to the universe by saying, “So Be It and So It Is.”  (Now, you must say these words exactly or you'll be sorry)

5. Blow your candle out. (You can't find true love if you die in a fire)

Hang onto your list. In the next 12 months, you’ll be able to see how your wish for true love came true!
Wow, who knew it was that simple?